To Be Where You Need To Be, You Must Accept Where You Are

There has been a theme these past few months. Let me know if you connect with this: To be where you need to be, you must accept where you are.

When I’ve said this to people, I’ve noticed two reactions: people are either hit with clarity or immediately feel angry. Whichever you’re met with when hearing or reading “accept where you are to get to where you’re going,” ask yourself why that is your reaction. 

Is the clarity you experience after trying to push your way to where you want to be? Is the anger you’re experiencing during years of you trying to make your way to where you want to be? Or is it due to fear? Maybe grief?

If we are constantly living in the future, how can we provide what we need for ourselves in the present? 

For example, a client with an inflammatory disease experienced excruciating pain and found herself in a wheelchair. She desperately searched for things to help ease her pain and help her walk again. She did find some relief, but she felt the pain immediately creep back in and was still unable to move without a wheelchair. Every day, this person would experience anger, depression, and sadness due to the effects and reality of this condition.

When you’re in pain, it becomes your total focus. You search only for things that will help ease that pain, which is understandable. Most of the time, what we find can help reduce the pain temporarily, and/or it makes it worse in the long run. When people hear, “Accept where you are,” they think of defeat because many feel they’re being asked to “give in” to the disease. But, you are actually choosing to listen to what your body needs at the moment. It is not defeat; it is quite the opposite.

My client accepted her current situation by admitting the unknown time length of her condition, accepting this condition came with discomfort, and realizing the uncertainty of being mobile without a wheelchair. Her mindset began to shift. Instead of focusing on a place she is not, she started researching her inflammatory disease to understand how to support herself within the condition.

My client discovered that specific foods triggered her pain, so she completely changed her diet. After self-exploring, there was clarity on what eased pain at the moment. Making changes also makes her mentally accept the unclarity of how long she will be in the wheelchair. All of these changes she made not only shifted her mental & emotional health but it helped her pain physically. 

We’re trying to heal a physical body that is not there in the future. When we shift our mindset to the here and now and understand where we are with our conditions, we begin to experience mental, emotional, and physical healing.

So, again, I say this isn’t defeat, but quite the opposite. You’re taking your power back and changing your mindset. There’s so much power in understanding what you can control. 

My client no longer needs a wheelchair and is just fine while managing her inflammatory disease. 

Everyone’s body and situations are different. Healing comes in various forms.

Erica Ware – Owner of Holistic Bodywork